From the monthly archives:
This character reminds me of the work of the Flemish artist, H. Bosch. What I like most about doodling is that I never know what image will emerge from a circle, a line, or a mark – sometimes it feels like magic, as if I’m wiping grains of sand away from a tablet to reveal an image that has always been there hidden.
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I once told my wife how disappointed I was that I might have to finally accept the fact that I may never play Batman in a movie. She replied by saying, “Maybe, but maybe you could draw him.”
This comment hit my head like Christopher Walken in the Dead Zone. I was stunned and all those obsessive memories of the Dark Knight came flooding back to me. She was right, I could draw him, but how would I?
How would I make him and the rogues galary my own? This line of questioning had awoken the long forgotten happiness I once experienced as a child using my crayons to draw Batman and Robin in the most dire circumstances.
Since then I have, on occasion, taken to doodle the caped crusader and his rivals. 
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Where did June and July go? Did anyone see them? I swear, they were here a minute ago.
I’ve been working like mad trying to get the house in order before Baby X arrives. I spent a month stripping, sanding, sanding again, and staining my sun porch. With the help of my fraternity brother we were able to dry wall the baby’s room. I did some sanding last night. Tomorrow, primer - Sunday, first coat of paint.
I think, subconsciously, that I want to empathize with my wife so badly while she is pregnant that I have adopted some of the typical symptoms women experience like weight gain, nausea in the morning, excessively tired, cravings, and the nesting instinct. Luckily, I’ve managed to skip on the constipation, hemorrhoids, swollen ankles, stretch marks, and peeing my pants when I sneeze. I never realized the havoc these personalized parasites could wreak on a mother’s body. There should be a warning label that girls have to memorize in middle school.
Warning! This activity could result in pregnancy. Pregnancy results may vary, side affects may include: nausea, hot flashes, extreme sensitivity to kittens or anything cute, random mood swings usually ending in someone crying, irritability, swollen ankles and feet, gas, acid reflux, head aches, muscle and joint pain, constipation, hemorrhoids, stretch marks, acne, spider veins, food cravings, weight gain, and loose skin. Women with body image issues may want to consult a therapist. Motherhood is not for everyone, if you are unable to take care of yourself and an absolutely vulnerable, dependent, pooping, crying and hungry human being without the assistance of your parent – please consider abstinence.
Due to my weight gain over the months I have been rubbing my belly while at work so maybe I’m having some jealousy issues. Feeling the baby roll around and push on my wife’s belly is one of the coolest things in the world that I’ve ever had the pleasure of experiencing. Two months to go!
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